Comments on: Overcoming Complex PTSD and Negative Core Beliefs

By: Teresa

Teresa — Fri, 28 Feb 2025 15:47:14 +0000

While I value and respect the study and elements that this article depicts, I do take issue with a bit of it. As someone with severe CPTSD and more than a decades training in the field, I have witnessed time and again, people being told that the first step being to change the language. CPTSD is not stored solely in the brain. People who have suffered lifelong abuse have trauma stored in the body. You cannot out think trauma. It does a grave disservice to people trying to learn to heal when all they keep seeing is “change your thoughts”. Then, no matter how hard they try, those thoughts are every part of them and they feel they are too broken to even think correctly. When in reality, even if you could start catching these thoughts enough to feel like you’ll ever make progress, thinking “I am beautiful and worthy” won’t change your body’s physiological response to whatever has kicked up the trauma response to begin with.
Also, trying to turn all the way from self hate to self love is something the mind rejects, too. The process of thought pattern change stands a better chance if you are trying to make them in reasonable increments. If you look at yourself and you truly believe you are ugly, it’s going to sound like a joke to tell yourself you’re beautiful. If you are working on thought pattern change like this, pick something less extreme. Strive for neutrality first. “It is just a body.” This statement removes the opinion and harmful language, but you are still making a small pivot to the pattern.

Overall, though, I hope no one thinks that if they are having trauma responses in their lives and changing their thoughts isn’t working, means they can’t heal, that is not true. Your body needs tending to. Your body responds to stimulus, which is why a certain sound or smell can cause such an extreme reaction. No amount of “positive thinking” will correct this. This doesn’t have to be the first step, and it may not be a step in your healing journey at all. You cannot out think your trauma. Some people can have thought pattern change be one component, and others it is absolutely useless. The healing will come from somewhere else. Don’t let this make you think you cannot heal because you cannot change the language on your core beliefs.

By: Kerrie

Kerrie — Mon, 12 Feb 2024 13:09:36 +0000

It is incredibly triggering to people with cPTSD to say things like “you are responsible for your negativity today, no one else.”

No one would ever say that to an adult who had trouble walking due to physical abuse. They’d say something like you have the power now, as an adult, to work on physical therapy to heal your wounds. and the attitude would never be that since they have access to physical therapy it’s their fault if they still struggle to walk.

Take care that your words don’t blame victims.

By: Sharon

Sharon — Thu, 26 Oct 2023 09:41:26 +0000

An excellent article. I would be interested in knowing more about Dee~s story. I lived in survival mode for 3 years trying to handle the politics targeted at me after the friend of the principle of the school where I worked assaulted me . INSTEAD OF RECEEIVING A DUE APPOLOGY I realised the friend was handpicked and would be protected at all costs. Out of the blue come a whole package of puppets , so scary now mobbing ME. This so that the incident isnt exposed. From screws in my car to other sabotage all unthinkable and not of that one is used to or expects . I went into I guess a detach mode of some sort. One comment was `looks like she is on another planet` , what kind of evil. Finally was basically forced to leave 3 years later when I knew this would kill me. Went to a new school and what wonderful people but funny , once the survival mode dropped it left a no confidence and one day sitting in the staff room , I literally felt the chair was above me ie that I had sunk right through , that no one could see me. Anyway just couldnt cope. Left and its been 14 years now basically of isolation, going through continued internal flashbacks, +++++. Did visit govt hosp once when suicide scared me. got zombee blockers which did nothing but block the thoughts for a bit which was beneficial. Things are slow to heal but hold on to that hope. Definately over time more hope and positivity. I never was `diagnosed` but have experienced all the dreadful horrors and am sure I have cptsd.Good luck to all the fellow sufferers.

By: Zsuzsa

Zsuzsa — Tue, 10 Oct 2023 06:09:32 +0000

In reply to Dee. Hi Dee. I feel you. CPTSD recovery also seems like a never ending uphill battle to me. I also MEGA struggle with financial independence and empowerment. The scholarship Shirley has recommended might be an option for you eh? Have you applied? I know it can seem impossible and might even sound like a straight up lie but there are people out there who you can build caring relationships with. You have that potential and you deserve it. For me it continues to be ALOT of work to have safe and meaningful and loving relationships. I feel extremely dissatisfied and uncomfortable and critical and judgemental of myself and others far too often. But I keep finding SOMETHING, no matter how tiny, within myself or in the world, that keeps me going. I love plants and herbalism and my doggie for example. And I have also managed to improve my relationship with my inner child and have come to find that she's awesome and deserves to be loved. Deserves to be happy. I don't know how else to show that I care about your plight Dee besides sharing my own story. I hope this helps, even if it's just because it helps you to realize you aren't alone in your suffering. Keep going, keep learning, keep looking for one tiny thing each day that sparks your interest, makes you feel alive and nourish that.

By: Emily B.

Emily B. — Sun, 06 Aug 2023 06:03:19 +0000

Shirley, you have finally created an article on what I suffered with for over 27 years of my life! This is the first article I have ever read that addresses What the C in C-PTSD really meant! And why I was not able to overcome it for so long! CPT targeted the core beliefs and trauma. It changed and helped me understand what hurt me for years, and how to stop the repeated trauma. I would love to see you do an article on the use of Cognitive Processing Therapy used for those diagnosed with C-PTSD. I had years of treatments, programs and every type of therapy. I am finally living in the light, and I fight like hell to keep myself from the pain! But it took my 27 years to find a therapist who was qualified to provide CPT therapy and everything just clicked. It saved my life, please research this method of treatment that could change lives.

By: Tim E

Tim E — Sun, 30 Apr 2023 04:34:55 +0000

Thanks for another great article Shirley. I recently discovered your writing after being diagnosed with CPTSD and it resonates like a warning bell through the fog.

The sentence “Because these beliefs are deeply set due to early adoption, you have accepted them as true” has a double meaning for me because I was adopted early (at six weeks of age) and internalised these beliefs as a consequence of my adoption. Damaged, broken, defective, worthless, unworthy, waste of space, rubbish and born to suffer are some of my negative core beliefs, as they are for many adoptees.
I was raised by a loving family, and wasn’t abused, so it seems as if I’ve inflicted the CPTSD on myself. The trouble is that the beliefs are at the core of my identity, which I had to construct myself because I had no frame of reference with which to understand why I am the way I am, and where I came from. My story began with rejection and commodification.

With no tangible past, it felt as though I had no future and I was convinced that I wouldn’t live to see the year 2000 (it nearly became a self-fulfilling prophesy). I’ve no idea why I fixated on that date but I know two other adoptees who had similar beliefs. My sense of disconnection from the past and future only changed when I had a daughter 14 years ago.

The core beliefs are so deep set that they feel more like foundational knowledge, even though I know they are toxic and unhelpful. Trying to change them is like trying to stop a tank in its tracks by throwing rocks at it. The irony is that I created the tank to survive and it very nearly killed me. I don’t know how to stop it.

I accept that my negativity is my responsibility, but it is hard to see how to change it.

By: Shirley Davis

Shirley Davis — Mon, 27 Mar 2023 10:51:04 +0000

In reply to Dee.

CPTSD Foundation has a scholarship program to pay for its programs. https://cptsdfoundation.org/scholarship-application/

I’m sorry you’ve had such a rough time finding the help you need. I hope you will avail yourself of our resources and feel better soon. Shirley

By: Dee

Dee — Mon, 27 Mar 2023 00:10:36 +0000

I’ve tried many free resources for over more than 2 decades to deal with my c-ptsd. Nothing has helped much. I have no money. I literally can’t pay. I’m passively suicidal. All of the therapies that could work cost money. I can’t live, but I don’t have the option to die. I don’t know what to do. I’d love it if you could help, but I suspect that I’m not rich enough for anyone to care. Please prove me wrong.