Erena DiGonis | CPTSDfoundation.org

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Reference:

Benson, H., & Klipper, M. Z. (1975). The relaxation response. New York, Avon.

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I am Erena, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified Health Coach, and trauma advocate based in New York. I am the founder of a group practice that specializes in working with clients who have anxiety and complex trauma.

As a New York State approved Continuing Education Provider for Social Workers, I am committed to ongoing education and staying up-to-date with the latest research in my field. In addition to treating clients in my practice, I supervise dozens of clinicians and coaches from diverse backgrounds. I have been featured in Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Psychology Today, Reader’s Digest, Women’s Health, and MEL magazine. I am a proud member of the CPTSD Foundation Advisory Board.

3 Tips to Tame Your Inner Critic

Erena DiGonis — Thu, 25 Apr 2024 09:49:12 +0000

This blog is dedicated to KL thank you for your courage and inspiration.

For trauma survivors, the battle with the inner critic can be particularly challenging

Those harsh, self-condemning voices from the past can linger in our minds. Whose voice is it anyway? The echoes of the inner critic can often be traced back to the traumatic events. It may be the voice of an abusive parent, a neglectful caregiver, or someone else whose actions contributed to the trauma. These voices may have become internalized during the traumatic experience(s), serving as a distorted reflection. The inner critic can also be fueled by societal expectations, cultural norms, or external judgments that the survivor has internalized. The pressure to conform to certain standards or expectations may contribute to a negative self-image, amplifying the critical voices within. I see you and acknowledge the courage it takes to confront these challenges. I want this blog to serve as a reminder that you are worthy and deserving to reclaim your sense of self-worth.

We will explore three tips to help confront and manage the inner critic, fostering self-compassion and aiding in the journey toward recovery.

Tip 1: Self-Compassion Is Your Friend: The first step in taming your inner critic is to embrace self-compassion. It’s crucial to understand that the negative thoughts and self-blame are not your fault. They are remnants of the trauma you’ve endured. Practice treating yourself with the kindness and understanding you’d offer to a close friend or a small child. Self-compassion involves acknowledging your pain without judgment and reassuring yourself that it’s okay to feel the way you do. You are not alone in this struggle; self-compassion can be your most powerful ally in silencing the inner critic.

Here is a tip for practicing and incorporating more self-compassionate self-talk: When negative thoughts arise, consciously pause and ask yourself: “What would I say to a friend in this situation?” Imagine the supportive and understanding words you would offer to someone you care about. Then, turn those compassionate words inward and speak to yourself with the same kindness. For example, if you catch yourself engaging in self-blame or harsh self-criticism, pause and say to yourself, “I know this is difficult, and it’s okay to feel this way. You’re doing your best, and I’m here for you.”

Tip 2: Mindfulness and Awareness: Mindfulness is another tool in the fight against the inner critic. Mindfulness simply means paying attention, being present in the moment, and observing your thoughts without judgment. When your inner critic raises its voice, take a step back and mindfully observe these negative thoughts as if they were passing clouds in the sky. By doing so, you can create space between yourself and your inner critic, making it easier to recognize when it’s at play.

Cultivating self-awareness is a significant aspect of this tip

Cultivating self-awareness is a significant aspect of this tip. Reflect on your triggers and patterns that provoke your inner critic. Awareness of what activates those critical voices can empower you to interrupt the cycle and respond with self-compassion instead.

Daily Mindful Activities: Infuse mindfulness into your daily routine by engaging fully in simple activities. Whether it’s washing dishes, walking, or eating a meal, focus on the sensations, sounds, and sights around you. I practice my mindful pause when I brush my teeth. This can anchor you in the present moment, making it easier to recognize and diffuse the influence of the inner critic.

Tip 3: Challenge Negative Thoughts: One powerful technique for managing your inner critic is to actively challenge negative thoughts. When the inner critic shows up, question the validity of those thoughts. Ask yourself if they are based on facts or if they are distorted perceptions influenced by your trauma. Counteract them with affirmations or neutral/positive statements about yourself. For example, if your inner critic says, “I’m worthless,” remind yourself of your strengths, achievements, and the love and support you receive from others. By actively disputing and getting curious about negative self-talk, you can weaken the grip of your inner critic. Remember, it is a humble practice.

Conclusion: Taming your inner critic as a trauma survivor is a courageous step on the path to healing. By practicing these tips, you can gradually quiet the harsh voices of the past and nurture a kinder, more compassionate inner dialogue. Your healing process is unique, and these strategies can help you move toward a place of greater self-acceptance and inner peace.

Call to Action:

As you embark on your journey to tame the inner critic and reclaim your sense of self-worth, I invite you to take a moment for reflection. Consider how these tips resonate with your own experiences, and recognize the strength it takes to confront the past.

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Breaking Up With Lazy

Erena DiGonis — Thu, 11 Apr 2024 09:10:28 +0000

In the therapy room, there’s a four-letter word that creates unease in my nervous system every time I hear it: “lazy.” Working with trauma survivors, I witness the fallout of abusive and neglectful households, and the last thing I want to hear is my incredible clients labeling themselves with a term that doesn’t do justice to their struggles and triumphs. So, let’s have a heart-to-heart about why it’s time to kick “lazy” to the curb and embrace the resilience that defines each one of you. In this discussion, we’ll delve into having self-compassion, acknowledging the intricate journey of healing, and reframing our perspectives to honor the strength that shines through adversity.

1. Understanding how trauma can contribute to the learning and focus challenges:
Let’s face it—life in a dysfunctional household is like trying to navigate a maze blindfolded. Learning and focus challenges are not a sign of laziness; they are a reality from an environment where survival often took precedence over algebra homework. When experiencing trauma, the frontal lobe—the brain region responsible for learning—can essentially go offline. We operate from an instinctual place of survival. Every day, I hear stories from my clients recounting their attempts to do well in school. It’s time to rewrite the narrative. Instead of berating yourself for struggles, acknowledge the effort it took just to make it through those challenging times. You’re not lazy; you’re a warrior who possesses the resilience to adapt and survive, even when the very cognitive tools for learning are compromised by the impact of trauma.

2: Ditch the Hustle for Worthiness: In a world obsessed with hustle culture, it’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that our worth is directly proportional to our productivity. Newsflash: That’s a load of nonsense. You are a trauma survivor. You’ve already proven your worth by navigating challenging, even impossible terrain. You don’t need to hustle for it; it’s inherent. So, let’s collectively kick the hustle mentality out the door and embrace the truth—you are magnificent and courageous, no hustle required.

3: Reframe Negative Beliefs: Let me share a therapeutic insight with you—humor is a potent remedy for negativity. So, when the “lazy” label sneaks into your thoughts, take a moment to reflect on it with compassion. Picture yourself as a superhero, granting yourself a well-deserved pause, or consider “lazy” as an acronym. What would you have it stand for? Approaching these moments with kindness can work wonders in reshaping negative beliefs, making it easier to disassemble them and replace them with narratives that empower and uplift them.

Original Thought: “I’m so lazy; I can’t seem to get anything done.”

Reframed Thought: “I’m prioritizing self-care and taking necessary breaks. I’m giving myself the space to recharge and come back stronger.”

I know it is hard, so we need to practice and practice some more

4: Celebrate Micro-Milestones: In the journey to break up with “lazy,” celebrate the small victories. Did you get out of bed today? That’s a win. Managed to focus on a task for 5 minutes? Another win. Go to work? Win!

Life after complex trauma is a series of micro-milestones, and each one deserves a round of applause. By acknowledging and celebrating these achievements, you’re actively rewriting the narrative of your capabilities. Remember, progress is progress, no matter how small.

To my incredible clients and colleagues, I see you, and I see the strength it takes to challenge these negative beliefs. You are not lazy; you are navigating a complex tapestry of experiences with courage and resilience. It’s time to rewrite your story—one that celebrates your worthiness without the unnecessary hustle. Together, let’s break up with “lazy” and redefine what it means to be magnificent and courageous in the face of adversity.

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The Courage of Finding Your Voice after Trauma

Erena DiGonis — Thu, 28 Mar 2024 09:14:43 +0000

Finding the courage and strength to be heard is a huge step in the journey of healing from trauma

As a trauma therapist, I am humbled and privileged to bear witness to my client’s stories in every session. In this space, I recognize the immense courage it takes for survivors to open up and share their experiences. I deeply respect the trust my clients place in me, knowing that they are revealing their most vulnerable and sensitive emotions.

Finding the courage and strength to be heard is a huge step in the journey of healing from trauma. One of my favorite definitions of trauma is by Dr. Peter Levine, “trauma is a loss of connection to ourselves, our bodies, to our families, to others, to the world around us.” Among the many disconnects caused by trauma, one significant aspect is our voice and truth.

As adults, we now have the power to reclaim our voices and share our stories

Growing up in an abusive and neglectful household can suppress one’s ability to understand and speak the truth. For so many of us, what is your truth? What do you need to feel seen, heard, and known? How does it feel to have someone listen?

As adults, we now have the power to reclaim our voices and share our stories. I want to acknowledge and celebrate the bravery it takes to speak up and offer some tips for supporting individuals to find their voice and tell their stories.

Self-Compassion and Understanding: Before speaking up, it is vital to cultivate self-compassion, patience, or whatever word lands well for you. Recognize that the lived experiences you endured were not your fault, and it is okay to feel hesitant to share your story. The journey toward healing is an active and humble process, and it is essential to be gentle with yourself as you navigate this path. Engage in activities that nurture your nervous and emotional well-being.

Safe Spaces and Supportive Allies: Finding safe spaces and supportive allies is crucial in empowering yourself to speak up. Trust is an essential component of sharing your story, and surrounding yourself with empathetic and understanding individuals can foster a sense of safety. Seek out support groups or like-minded communities focused on trauma survivors. Sharing your experiences with others who have gone through similar challenges can provide validation, encouragement, and a sense of belonging. We can also confide in close friends or family members whom we trust, knowing they will listen without judgment and support our journey of healing. Remember, healing is not linear, and it is okay to take your time to find your voice.

Gradual Exposure and Boundaries: Speaking up about past trauma can be overwhelming, so take it one step at a time. Gradual exposure allows you to build confidence and resilience as you find your voice. Start by expressing 1 or 2 words that come up for you in a private journal or through creative outlets like art, music, or poetry. As you become more comfortable, consider sharing parts of your story with a supportive individual before sharing it more publicly.

Establish clear boundaries for yourself during this process. You have the right to decide when, where, and with whom you share your experiences. Respect your limits and take breaks when needed. Speaking up can be emotionally draining, so remember to prioritize self-care and emotional regulation throughout this journey.

The path to finding your voice is a testament to your courage and strength as a survivor. Embrace self-compassion, seek supportive allies, and take it one step at a time with gradual exposure and clear boundaries. Your story matters, and by sharing it, you reclaim your power and inspire others to find their voices and heal.

I want to express my deepest gratitude for allowing me into your world, for entrusting me with your stories, and for embodying the strength that lies within vulnerability. As we continue this journey together, know that you are not alone—I am here, hand on heart, honoring the beauty, and resilience that defines you.

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Why I Said No to Resolutions in 2024

Erena DiGonis — Tue, 13 Feb 2024 10:03:33 +0000

As the calendar flips to a new year, we hear so many people talking about fresh starts and the pressure to create the perfect resolution. Here’s the scoop: I’ve seen firsthand how New Year’s resolutions often become constraints of expectation, leading to self-criticism, and disappointment. So, I have collectively pressed pause on resolutions and explored a more balanced and compassionate approach—setting daily intentions. It’s time to ditch the austerity and embrace the art of adding, keeping, and stopping.

Add Something to Your Day:
Instead of focusing on what you lack, let’s shift our perspective to what we can add. For example, imagine incorporating a few minutes of mindful breathing into your morning routine. Picture it: you, a cup of coffee, and a few intentional breaths to kickstart your day. Remember, small additions can lead to significant shifts over time. Whenever the thought of “not enough” crosses your mind, consider how these modest changes accumulate, creating a meaningful impact on your overall well-being. Isn’t something better than nothing?
Keep Doing What Works:
We all have habits that serve us well, so why not recognize, celebrate, and keep doing them? Whether it’s a nightly ritual of reading a good book or a weekly catch-up call with a friend, these are the overlooked healthy habits of our daily lives. After all, if it’s working well and bringing moments of happiness, why not lean into it?

Here are some of my practices:

Listen to a daily guided meditation. I like them for 5 minutes or less.
Take a 30-minute walk
Practice moments of mindful observation by observing my surroundings without judgment. Notice colors, textures, temperature, and sounds, etc.
Write in my journal
Prioritize my sleep routine
Listen to fiction audiobooks and give my brain a rest.
Maintain a balanced and nutritious diet

Stop Doing What Doesn’t Serve You:
Now, let’s talk about some honest self-reflection. I know it isn’t fun to do. What’s that one thing you can let go of to create room for more calmness? Whether it’s the constant scroll through social media that leaves you feeling depleted or agreeing to commitments that bring you down, pinpoint these draining habits in your life and say goodbye. Remember you have choices. Reclaim your time and energy.
Embrace Daily Intentions:
Rather than constraining yourself with grand resolutions that might feel rigid, consider the liberating practice of setting daily intentions.

Begin each day with a small and straightforward intention. So, what’s your meaningful and simple daily intention today?

To my resilient clients and colleagues, let’s navigate this new year with a mindset of compassion and ease. You are not defined by rigid resolutions but by the daily choices that shape your life. Let’s add some intention to each day, keep doing what brings you joy, stop what no longer serves you, and remember: you’re already magnificent just as you are. Here’s to a new year filled with growth, consistency, and self-love. Cheers!

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A Candid Guide to Navigating the Holidays

Erena DiGonis — Wed, 06 Dec 2023 10:24:41 +0000

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, warmth, and festivities. However, for many of us, especially those who have experienced complex trauma, this time of year can be a rollercoaster of emotions, stressors, and challenges. Let’s take a moment to acknowledge the elephant in the room: the holidays can be hard. Really hard. We can lean into the holidays and emerge with a plan that’s not only effective but infused with compassion and empowerment.

Embrace the Imperfection of it All: You know those holiday social media posts that showcase perfectly decorated homes and families in matching outfits? Well, don’t believe the hype of “Facebook happy” because everyone has some tension and conflict. Whether it’s untangling holiday lights or surviving a family dinner with awkward moments. The truth is, life is messy, and the holidays are no exception. So, let’s take a deep breath together, gently adjust our expectations, and compassionately embrace the imperfections. Acknowledging the hardships that trauma can bring to this season, recognizing and honoring our unique stories contribute to the true beauty of the holidays, found in the authentic and imperfect moments we share.
Set Boundaries Like a Pro: The holiday season often comes with a generous side of social obligations, family gatherings, and well-meaning invitations. While it’s tempting to say yes to everything, remember that boundaries are your best friend. Politely decline those events that drain your energy and leave you feeling overwhelmed. Your well-being comes first, and saying no is not a crime—it’s an act of self-preservation. So, channel your inner boundary-setting ninja and give yourself the gift of a stress-free holiday season. You are deserving and worthy of ease.
Create Your Own Traditions: Who says you have to stick to the conventional holiday script? If the idea of attending a bustling family dinner or navigating crowded shopping malls contributes to stress and anxiety, it’s time to rewrite the rules. Create your own traditions that align with your comfort and joy. Whether it’s a solo movie night with your favorite comfort food or a quiet day spent in nature, the holidays are an opportunity to celebrate in a way that nourishes your soul. After all, you’re the author of your story, and it’s perfectly okay to stray from the traditional narrative.

Prioritize Self-Care (No, Seriously): In the whirlwind of holiday chaos, it’s easy to neglect the most important person in the room—you. Amidst the gift wrapping, meal planning, and festive gatherings, don’t forget to prioritize self-care like your life depends on it—because it does. Whether it’s a cozy evening with a good book, a walk in a quiet spot, or simply taking a moment to breathe, make self-care a non-negotiable part of your holiday agenda. You’re not being selfish; you’re practicing survival in style.

As we navigate the unpredictable terrain of the holiday season, let’s remember that it’s okay to feel a mix of emotions. Trauma survivors have weathered storms before and you have the resilience to face whatever the holidays throw your way. So, wrap yourself in the warmth of self-compassion and navigate this season with the courage and grace that define your journey. The CPTSD Foundation offers incredible daily support. Cheers to thriving and embracing the beautifully imperfect tapestry of our lives.

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Overwhelmed? Try One of These Grounding Techniques

Erena DiGonis — Thu, 19 Oct 2023 09:26:37 +0000

Everyone experiences anxiety and stress. Life’s demands and our lived experiences can leave us feeling emotionally overwhelmed and flooded. The good news? You hold the power to hit the pause button and equip yourself with effective tools to regain control in such moments. It’s a humble and simple daily practice that can be quite challenging.

Grounding techniques offer a way to anchor yourself to the present, helping you manage and flow through these emotions.

Embrace the Present Moment:

Imagine an oak tree standing tall in the middle of a powerful storm. What keeps the tree upright and prevents it from being uprooted by the fierce winds? It’s the extensive network of its deeply embedded roots. In a similar way, grounding techniques serve as your emotional roots, allowing you to maintain a firm connection to the present moment, even when the storms of anxiety and stress swirl around you. The primary goal isn’t to eliminate anxiety, but rather to empower you to effectively manage it while remaining securely grounded in the here and now.

Engaging the Mind and Senses:

One powerful grounding technique combines the focus of your mind with the awareness of your senses. Let’s explore an approach that’s effective for many individuals:

1. Move Your Body: Changing your physical position can work wonders. If you’re seated, stand up. If you’re indoors, step outside for a moment. Engaging your body can disrupt the loop of anxious thoughts, redirecting your attention to your surroundings.

2. The “Categories” Game: Challenge your mind to play the “categories” game. Think of items that fit into specific categories for each letter of the alphabet. For example, names of animals, famous people, or types of cars. This exercise nudges your thoughts away from anxiety triggers and into a more structured and engaging mental space.

3. Colorful Observation: Gaze out the nearest window and start naming all the green objects you see. Notice the various shades of green – how they differ and merge. This simple act of observation and description shifts your focus to the external environment.

4. Tune Into Music: Music is a universal language that can bridge the gap between anxiety and calmness. Play a favorite song and listen intently. Instead of letting your mind wander, zero in on one instrument. Explore its sound, nuances, and rhythm. This exercise engages your auditory senses and helps anchor you in the present moment.

Much like learning a new skill, using grounding techniques takes time and practice

Patience and Practice:

Much like learning a new skill, using grounding techniques takes time and practice. Think of it as rewiring your brain’s response to stress. Rather than sitting with the discomfort of activation, you’re actively moving through it. Each time you employ these techniques, you’re building a bridge to a calmer state of mind.

Embracing these techniques requires a shift in mindset. It’s not about erasing anxiety, but about learning to manage and flow through it. The next time you feel anxiety knocking on your mental door, remember the tools you hold – the power to ground yourself, pause, and find less activation in the present.

Conclusion:

As you navigate through life’s challenges, remember to keep these grounding techniques in your toolkit. They serve as your lifeline to inner peace, a constant reminder that you possess the ability to maintain emotional balance even in the midst of life’s most turbulent moments. By incorporating these practices into your daily routine, you empower yourself to navigate anxiety and stress with increased resilience and heightened awareness.

I invite you to try integrating these grounding techniques into your day. Let us know what you like and what lands well for you.

For coaches and therapists, I invite you to explore my training courses with evidence-based and practical interventions. You will be able to immediately apply strategies to assist your clients effectively. Discover more about the courses and enroll today at https://app.ce-go.com/erenadigonis/courses.

5 Fun and Creative Ways to Start Journaling

Erena DiGonis — Wed, 20 Sep 2023 09:01:49 +0000

Last month, I wrote a blog article about structured approaches to journaling, which I hope were able to check out. Journaling can be a powerful tool for healing from trauma and dealing with the day-to-day stressors of life. Journaling provides a safe and private space to express thoughts, emotions, and experiences, helping to process and release pent-up feelings.

Not everyone loves the “Dear Diary” narrative format (present company included), so I want to offer you five fun and creative ways to start a journaling practice.

Discover the Power of Quotes: Begin your journaling with a powerful quote that resonates with your experiences. Select a quote that speaks to your emotions, aspirations, or the challenges you’ve faced. Write it down in your journal. You can try using different colored pens and each color can represent a different emotion. As you write, reflect on the quote’s meaning in relation to your own experiences. I like this prompt because the blank page can be intimidating and might not know what to write or where to begin.
Create Visual Collages: Visuals can often convey feelings that words struggle to capture. Isn’t it true that a picture is worth a thousand words? Cut out pictures from magazines or print images that symbolize different emotions, hopes, and goals related to your healing journey. Glue these images into your journal and write a word or short phrase beneath each picture that reflects your experience. This creative process can help you explore your emotions in a unique and visually engaging way, cultivating a deeper connection with your journaling practice.
Capture Emerging Words: In your journaling sessions, I invite you to identify a single word that resonates with you at that moment. This word could represent an emotion you’re feeling, a realization you’ve had, or a quality you want to nurture. Write this word prominently on the page and allow it to become a focal point for your reflections. Over time, as you look back at these words, you will witness your own shifts of healing and growth. One word can capture a lot.
Embrace Stream of Consciousness Writing: Sometimes, the best way to release thoughts and emotions is to simply let them flow onto the page without judgment or structure. Set a timer for 5-10 minutes and write whatever comes to mind. Don’t worry about grammar, just allow your thoughts to pour out. This unfiltered stream-of-consciousness writing can help you uncover hidden emotions, untangle complex feelings, and gain clarity on your experiences. It’s a freeing way to empty your mind onto the paper and make space for healing. Don’t overthink it, pen to the paper, and go!
Dialogue with Your Inner Self: Imagine having a conversation with your inner self—the part of you that holds your feelings, fears, and dreams. Write a note in your journal as if you’re speaking to this inner self, expressing your thoughts and emotions openly. Then, respond as your inner self, offering guidance, comfort, and understanding. This exercise can facilitate a deeper connection with your emotions and provide a sense of self-compassion. What would you want the highest and wisest part of you to say? Again, this is a prompt to try without overthinking it.

Conclusion:

Starting a journaling practice within the context of trauma recovery can be both therapeutic and empowering. Incorporating these creative techniques can make the process enjoyable and meaningful. Remember, there’s no right or wrong way to journal—what matters most is that you are giving yourself the space to explore your emotions and experiences in a way that feels authentic to you.

When you start anything new, be patient with yourself. Healing takes time, and your journal can serve as a tool and companion along the way, capturing your growth, insights, and moments of strength. Through these five fun journaling methods, you’ll find a safe outlet to process your trauma, gain a deeper understanding of yourself, and move forward on your path to recovery.

Call to Action:

I invite you to try one of these fun approaches and carve out a space for your thoughts, emotions, and reflections. Start with 2-3 minutes, make it realistic for your life and schedule. Remember that every step counts no matter how small it might be.

Are you a therapist or coach looking to expand your therapeutic toolkit? I invite you to explore my course on journaling.

Visit https://app.ce-go.com/erenadigonis/courses to learn more and enroll today.

The Anxiety Relief Tool You Need to Try

Erena DiGonis — Tue, 12 Sep 2023 10:33:27 +0000

Introduction:

We all deal with anxiety – that mix of nerves, restlessness, and worries that can make life feel overwhelming. No surprise, anxiety is the most common mental health diagnosis in the United States. Anxiety can look different in everyone, especially if you have a complex trauma history, which makes your nervous system overwhelmed. Common anxiety symptoms include worry, nervousness, fear, trouble sleeping, increased heart rate, sweating, fatigue, poor concentration, feeling out of breath, distraction, heaviness in the chest, stomach issues and so much more.

I love helping clients work through anxiety because it is something we can improve. There are so many tools to share that reduce this kind of activation in the body and mind. In this article, I will focus on my favorite method of calming the nervous system. This simple tool is something anyone can try, no matter who you are. Let me introduce you to “Sit and Stare” – a quick and powerful way to reduce anxiety.

How the ‘Sit and Stare’ Tool Works:

Life can get super busy and stressful. So, it’s important to take short and frequent pauses throughout the day. It only takes 1 to 2 minutes, but it can make a big difference in how you feel. Think of the accumulation of these pauses by the end of the week, it adds up.

Imagine this: you’re watching the ocean waves or staring at clouds moving in the sky. You feel peaceful, right? “Sit and Stare” is about bringing you that calm feeling. These activities positively influence the Default Mode Network in the brain into more passive mind wandering.

This is very different than getting stuck in a worry cycle.

Light a candle and look at the flame. Watch the dance of colors and how the flame moves. Inhale deeply, exhale longer. What color do you see? Take another deep breath and notice any smell from the candle. Listen to the gentle sound of the flame. Take another deep breath, and exhale longer than you inhale. Feel your feet on the ground and pay attention to your breathing. Just start to notice how you are feeling at this moment. Continue to observe the flame for another moment or two.

Making It a Habit:

The cool thing about “Sit and Stare” is that it’s easy to do anytime. Put a candle on your desk or somewhere you like to sit. Throughout the day, try it out for 30 seconds to a minute. Doing this regularly adds up and it can help you feel less activated. How can you make this a habit in your life?

While this tool can be very powerful, anxiety management tends to work best with a wide variety of techniques used every day. I like thinking about it as an anxiety management daily practice. Unfortunately, it isn’t something we can do weekly or monthly rather short bursts throughout the day.

Remember, simplicity is powerful. The “Sit and Stare” tool reminds us that we can find relief from anxiety in micro-moments. So, the next time anxiety starts to bother you, take a deep breath, light a candle, and watch the flame dance. Feel the magic of mindfulness and enjoy how it frees your mind and body. It all starts with a single, calming gaze with little pockets of relative safety and connection.

Let’s Try It Together:

I warmly invite you to try this for yourself and create a daily habit of incorporating tools to manage anxiety.

For coaches and therapists, check out my anxiety management course to equip yourself with evidence-based interventions and insights to help individuals cope with anxiety and regain control over their lives. You will leave with concrete strategies you can apply immediately with your clients.

Discover more about the course and enroll today at https://app.ce-go.com/erenadigonis/courses.

The Power of Journaling: Structured Approaches for Trauma Recovery

Erena DiGonis — Wed, 02 Aug 2023 13:06:25 +0000

Introduction:

I’ll never forget the first time I encountered journaling. It was watching the 1980s movie Heathers where I was captivated by the lead character pouring her heart out in her diary. This moment sparked my curiosity about journaling. Over the years, I’ve discovered that sometimes the words flow effortlessly, while other times, I struggle to find the right starting point.

As a therapist specializing in complex trauma, I’ve witnessed the power of structured journaling in the recovery process. It’s become my passion to support individuals on their healing journey, and I’ve found that incorporating therapeutic tools like journal prompts, sentence stems, and list-making techniques provide a strong foundation for healing.

Fear of the Blank Page

The hesitation of facing a blank page is something many of us can relate to, especially when it involves traumatic or stressful events. While free-form journaling can be beneficial, structured approaches provide additional support and containment during recovery, which is why I love this option. Dealing with our emotions and memories can feel overwhelming, leaving us unsure of where to start or how to navigate the intense thoughts and feelings that emerge. Structured journaling offers a valuable framework and guide while inviting memories, self-reflection, and deeper exploration.

So, what do we do when we find ourselves staring at the blank page, uncertain of where to begin? Incorporating structured techniques into your journaling practice can enhance your ability to process emotions, gain valuable insights, and nurture your resilience. Remember that perfection isn’t the goal here, nor is a rigid adherence to a particular structure. I invite you to discover what resonates with you.

Journal Prompts and Sentence Stems

Journal prompts and sentence stems provide a helpful structure for expressing emotions, thoughts, and memories associated with trauma. They offer a starting point that can facilitate a more focused and intentional journaling practice. Consider incorporating these prompts into your journaling routine:

Today, I am proud of myself for…
One thing I would like to let go of is…
When I think about my family (or childhood), I feel…
The strengths I have gained from my experiences are…
If I could offer my younger self one piece of advice, it would be…
I feel [emotion] when I think about…
The impact of my trauma on my life has been…
Something I wish others understood about my experiences is…
Today, I am working towards…
Today, I am taking care of myself by…
A challenge I am currently facing in my healing journey is…
One thing I appreciate about my resilience is…
One thing I appreciate about (social support)…
When I reflect on my progress, I feel…
Something I would like to forgive myself for is…
A boundary I need to establish for my well-being is…
I am showing up for myself today by…

Remember, these sentence stems are meant to inspire self-reflection and promote healing. Feel free to modify them to suit your personal experiences and needs.

Mind Mapping

Another option that I like is called Mind Mapping or Clustering. This visual representation can help you see connections, patterns, and new perspectives. Start with a central idea or theme in the middle of a blank page and create a mind map by circling the idea or theme and then creating branches with related thoughts, emotions, and memories. Use free association with the central idea.

(Add a photo with an example.)

List-Making: Organizing Thoughts and Emotions

List-making is a fun technique that can help us organize our thoughts and emotions in a structured and concise manner. A list offers a sense of containment and clarity, making it easier to process and manage complex feelings associated with trauma. Consider these list-making approaches:

a) Gratitude lists: Reflecting on things you are grateful for can foster a positive mindset and counterbalance negative thoughts.
b) Self-care lists: Identifying activities that promote self-care can enhance emotional well-being and provide a sense of self-nurturing.
c) Triggers and coping strategies lists: Identifying triggers and effective coping strategies empowers individuals to manage potential triggers and develop healthy coping mechanisms.
d) Achievements lists: Recognizing personal accomplishments, no matter how small, can help rebuild self-esteem and confidence.

By incorporating list-making techniques into their journaling practice, individuals can develop a sense of order and stability while acknowledging and addressing their trauma-related challenges. To increase engagement, I like using different colored pens when I mind map and create lists.

Conclusion

Structured journaling approaches, including journal prompts, sentence stems, mind mapping, and list-making techniques can significantly support individuals on their journey of trauma recovery. These approaches provide a container for emotions, foster self-reflection, and enable individuals to gain insights, process their experiences, and develop strategies for healing and growth. Remember, while journaling can be a powerful self-help practice, it is essential to seek professional guidance from a trauma-informed therapist to ensure a safe and effective trauma recovery journey.

Call to Action

I warmly invite you to experience the benefits of structured journaling and embark on a transformative journey of self-reflection, healing, and personal growth. Is there a prompt that lands well for you? Are you a therapist or coach looking to expand your therapeutic toolkit? I invite you to explore my comprehensive course on journaling. In this course, you’ll discover the art and science of incorporating structured journaling approaches into your therapeutic repertoire.

Visit to learn more and enroll today.

References:

Adams, K. (2009). Journal to the Self. Grand Central Publishing.

Pennebaker, J.W. (2004). Writing to Heal: A Guided Journal for Recovering from Trauma and Emotional Upheaval. Oakland CA: New Harbinger Publications.

Ross, D., & Adams, K. (2016). Your Brain on Ink: A Workbook on Neuroplasticity and the Journal Ladder. Rowman & Littlefield.