Blind Cruelty

How do we perceive, interpret, or process the reality of human behavior that goes on around us? The best answer is: “very carefully.”

When another’s presence approaches our self-imposed safety bubble or personal space, we have choices about how to interpret the “intrusion.” It can be seen as a safe and welcome experience, where we respond emotionally positively and let them in. We are protected and find comfort and safety from potential threats to our well-being by maintaining a respected distance from others.

This is our safe zone, private shield, or our socially “agreed-upon” personal space. It should be a given to a sound-minded individual that they graciously knock at our door before imposing their behavior upon us. That is especially true if the intrusion is uninvited and/or in a self-righteous sense of permission to do as they please, with no respect for us; if they do not knock, we “should” be leery. For many people, it takes courage to say, “You didn’t knock first before engaging with me.”

Some people have no internalized boundaries. That goes for those who boldly enter another’s space uninvited, as well as many who allow others to violate their boundary without giving permission. Entering another’s personal space powerfully, dominantly, or, especially, with hypercharged anger is a violation of their personal sovereignty—a violation of their right to personal dignity and self-respect (this signifies the “blindness” to respect).

An innocent, vulnerable child depends on its parents or caretakers to defend their innate boundaries. Parents protect us and allow us to grow and flourish. Boundaries help to keep us safe.

Sovereignty is my claim, my authority; it is my personal power and enforced right to be the overseer of me and my space within and around me, keeping me safe.

I reserve the right to make my own life choices, to exclude others, and to make my own decisions. I am individuated, and I hold my ground as a God-given right. It is not being rude to expect others to respect us by acknowledging our right to sovereignty over our space and ourselves. Through self-governance, my choices are made from internal understanding, not from external sources or groupthink.

This was the concept I sought: the construct and the understanding of why and how our trampled-upon innate boundaries damage us.

First and foremost, our personal boundaries are fragile to assault and dismantling in our childhood. A controlling parent who demands strict obedience wants to strip away our personal voice, which stands as an obstacle to their control. Over time, far too many of us find ourselves powerless to stand tall and defend against those who would do us harm during and after childhood.

Part of a parent’s job in rearing a child is to protect the child’s boundaries from others’ assaults. Protection from physical, emotional, psychological, and any other harm that threatens to derail a sound foundation of self-development and self-empowerment is a parent’s responsibility (and society, it takes a village to raise a child).

If a human being sets their toxic-chaotic rage upon someone, crossing and violating another’s private sanctuary of presence, it appears as an unthoughtful emotional assault. Here, “unthoughtful” is indeed an inappropriately lightweight word. “Blind” seems more appropriate. Lack of self-awareness and self-understanding leads to an inner self-permission to grant or justify the assault upon another.

Thus, what we do and how we harm others can be considered acts of “blind self-righteousness.” On a subconscious level, the impression develops that “others are unworthy of respect or being treated with dignity.” We don’t envision how anyone deserves respect, not if they are to be controlled and dominated, as some seem driven to do. We can become completely “blind” to the respect and rights that humanity deserves.

When inner rage takes control, there is often a lashing-out behavior toward others in a hurtful manner. We become blinded by rage, ignorance, and human tradition. A lack of awareness and/or understanding can be due to human or cultural traditions.

Our innate boundary, our mind’s inner sanctum of being respected, revered, watched over, and authentically loved, is strong. We develop, through a permission structure, self-esteem and confidence, as well as the ability to think for ourselves. An unsound/damaged boundary structure has internalized the disrespect and obedience demanded from “blind” adherents of a sick societal structure.

A structure or expectation that you have no right to object to abuse and that you “should” blindly show fealty to another’s rights to dictate your behavior, thoughts, and emotions. Self-regulation and self-governance may lie deep within, having given way to an inner tyranny or blocking of individualist thinking. “Groupthink” is adopting the beliefs of those who are important to us. This leaves us as cogs in the social operation, from a group-enforced understanding of sometimes questionable “truths.”

Cruelty. When someone’s personal power and self-regulation are harmed, a sense of emptiness remains.

A hole that aches from the loss of structure and unconditional LOVE. The inner damage may result from being trauma-wounded during important developmental stages of life. A consequence of hidden, or repressed abuse and pain, too often manifests as an emotional energy or brewing rage. That rage can darken an individual’s worldview and perspective, including, in all respects, a furious, evil attitude toward others who might be present.

Utter “cruelty” toward others, in the “blinding” rage of repressed fury at the world at large, can take control. Someone may step into another’s private sacred world of secure boundaries and do unspeakable things of intentional violence. Hurting others with the sense of sadistic fury, haunting the innocent others who, before the enraged trance, were safe from harm.

Like a light switch being flicked on, inner trauma ignites and activates the nervous systems of deeply wounded souls.

Being blinded to love, respect, dignity, and all that is good and decent, gets lost in the fog of a building inner dark emotional wasteland. This emotional space stands at the gates of a developing self-annihilation. It is a consuming anxiety waiting to turn the inner abused adult-child’s world into a sadistic imperative to lash out in a teeth-grinding fury. I sit in the later years of life, viewing the rage and utter bedlam my parents brought upon me in the formative years of my youth.

I see and know the face-twisting fury my mother experienced, brought on by the extreme abuse her inner child endured in her early years. Her story is a tale of savagery, formulated and expressed over the decades. Her behavior made no sense to the vulnerable and sensitive child that I was. Her secretive behavior, shared only between the two of us, was “blind cruelty.”

Generally, she had enough awareness to avoid exposing that boundary-violating behavior in front of others. Occasionally, she would slip up and be witnessed outside the front door. She was unable to, in any way, understand her own demonic episodes. We all need to become aware of what trauma is, what it does, and how it can be approached and treated in our developing understanding of human boundaries and our need for love.

What is trauma? Trauma is an emotional imprinting in our nervous system. An intense, dramatic experience can register emotionally, develop, or serve as the genesis of an “internalized,” reactive emotional state or wound. It can take on a life of its own. Trauma is the internalized, captured, emotion imprinting that “sticks,” establishing the genesis of an inner living nightmare.

BLIND CRUELTY
By Jesse Donahue © 2026

Photo Credit: Unsplash

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