I see you’re crying again.
Don’t worry about the sheets. I’ll wash them tomorrow.
What do you need?
Can I hold your hand?
You don’t want to be touched?
It’s okay. I understand.
You know, your sensitivity is not something to fix.
DBT is not your answer.
Nor is CBT or medication.
I think you know this—but let me remind you.
The answer is that pen and journal sitting on your nightstand.
I know you struggle to speak.
I also know there is a story within you that is wanting to be told.
You have a way with words.
A reader once said there’s a leader within you.
I see it.
Maybe you struggle to speak.
Maybe you chip at your nail polish feverishly when you sit across from someone.
Maybe this is true.
You’re a speech-language pathologist though, and you know that you don’t have to use your voice in order to say something.
I hope that one day you grab that pen and paper and share your story.
The world needs to hear from you.
It’s the most beautiful quality about you.
Channel it, make art, and let the world see your truth.
They are waiting to hear from you, and so am I.
*Originally published on Elephant Journal
Rebecca Donaldson is a confessional poet, a Speech-Language Pathologist, and a PhD student in Positive Developmental Psychology. Her research interests include adverse childhood experiences, resiliency, narrative identity, and personality development across the lifespan. She writes on topics pertaining to psychotherapy, Internal Family Systems, inequity, and the shamed soul with Borderline Personality Disorder. She believes therapy should be collaborative between client and therapist and writes to advocate for improved treatment for clients with BPD, complex PTSD, and DID. For her, writing is a medium of self-expression in which she can be open, honest, and reflective about the mud in her life and the flowers which grow from it. She attempts to be raw with the world as she is with her friends and disowns all labels of mental illness. She is a human being, a researcher, and a dancer of Brazilian Forrô.