The Power of Co-Regulation

Fostering Emotional Resilience at Work

Have you ever found yourself feeling overwhelmed or emotionally drained at work? If so, you’re not alone. Many of us have experienced moments of dysregulation in the workplace, where our emotions feel out of control, and we struggle to cope with stress. As a resilient career coach, the most common request I get is how to manage emotional dysregulation or being triggered in the workplace.

FUN FACT: Did you know that infants are born without the ability to regulate their internal emotional and physiological states? That’s where co-regulation comes in. In this article, we will explore what co-regulation is, why it is important, what happens when we don’t have adequate co-regulation, and how to help others or yourself co-regulate in the workplace.

What is Co-Regulation?

Co-regulation is a crucial process in early childhood development that involves the caregiver’s external regulation of the infant’s internal emotional and physiological states. Caregivers engage in co-regulation by responding to the infant’s cues, such as crying, through soothing actions like holding, rocking, and speaking in a calming voice. Consistent, sensitive co-regulation helps the infant feel secure and develops their ability to self-regulate.

The Impact of Inadequate Co-Regulation

Unfortunately, not everyone receives the co-regulation they need as infants. When caregivers are inconsistent, unresponsive, or neglectful, it can lead to difficulties with self-regulation and emotional regulation in adulthood.

• Adults who experienced inadequate co-regulation as infants may struggle with managing stress, anxiety, and emotions effectively.
• They may be more prone to mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety disorders, and difficulties in forming healthy relationships.
• These individuals may also have a harder time with self-soothing and may engage in unhealthy coping mechanisms to manage stress and emotions.

Seeking Co-Regulation in the Workplace

Seeking co-regulation in the workplace can be a powerful step towards healing and emotional well-being. While it may feel vulnerable to reach out for support, remember that you are not alone, and there are people who want to help. Here are some ways to seek co-regulation at work:

Identify safe people: Look for colleagues or supervisors who you trust and feel comfortable confiding in. These may be people who have shown empathy, kindness, or understanding in the past.

Communicate your needs: When you’re feeling dysregulated, let your trusted colleagues know that you could use some support. Be specific about what would help you at the moment, whether it’s a listening ear, a short break, or a grounding exercise.

Participate in workplace wellness programs: Many companies offer stress management workshops, mindfulness classes, or employee assistance programs. Take advantage of these resources to build your co-regulation skills and connect with supportive colleagues.

Seek professional help: If you’re struggling with intense emotions or trauma symptoms, consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can provide additional support and guidance.

Seeking co-regulation is a sign of strength, not weakness. By reaching out for support, you’re taking an active step towards your own emotional well-being and resilience.

When I was just beginning my healing journey, I often became dysregulated with business partners while doing my job. Fortunately, I had a manager I could reach out to when that happened. She would make time for me to talk through the situation and name the feelings I was experiencing. Most of the time, it only took less than five minutes to get myself regulated, but I needed help at first. Not every manager can do that.

Strategies for Co-Regulation in the Workplace

So, how can we support co-regulation in the workplace, especially for trauma survivors? Here are some strategies to try:

Create a safe and supportive environment: Foster a work culture that values open communication, empathy, and mutual support. Encourage colleagues to seek help when needed and offer assistance to those who may be struggling.

Practice active listening and validation: When someone is feeling dysregulated, give them your full attention and listen without judgment. Validate their feelings and show that you care about their well-being.

Offer co-regulation strategies: Guide your colleague through deep breathing exercises, encourage them to take a break, or suggest a grounding activity to help them regain emotional balance.

Collaborate on problem-solving: Once your colleague has regained some emotional regulation, work together to identify triggers and brainstorm coping strategies. Help them develop a plan to prevent future episodes of dysregulation.

Provide ongoing support: Check in with your colleague regularly and offer continued support. Encourage them to seek additional resources, such as counseling or stress management training, if needed.

By incorporating co-regulation strategies in the workplace, we can create a more supportive and emotionally healthy environment for everyone, especially trauma survivors. Remember, co-regulation is a skill that we can all learn and practice — and it starts with small, consistent actions that prioritize empathy, understanding, and mutual support.

An Invitation

If you’d like to join an online community of other resilient overcomers focusing on their careers, I invite you to join The Resilient Career Academy™ Community. (RCA Community)

The RCA Community is a FREE group dedicated to helping/supporting those working to overcome adversity and achieve their full potential in their careers.

The benefits to you are:

• Community — The community provides support, encouragement, the ability to share frustrations and get feedback from people who understand the struggle
• Workplace/Career Resources — The group provides tools, resources, and templates to help you with your career journey
• Available Coaching Support — The community is supported by trained and certified coaches who are available for individual sessions
• Learning — You will have access to various trauma/workplace-related online courses developed by our coaches to help you in your journey
• Workshops/Webinars — You will have access to practical workshops/webinars targeted to help you in the workplace grow your career

If you are interested in joining us, click here: https://resilientcareeracademy.myflodesk.com/community

As always, you do not have to walk this journey alone. Contact me to schedule your free discovery call.

Trigger Tracker Template — This is a FREE resource to help you become aware of your triggers in the workplace and plan the coping strategies you will use to get through the experience.

Get on the waiting list for The Resilient Career Academy™. You won’t want to miss it.

If you want to stay informed on the programs, tools, and training I offer, sign up for my mailing list.

You can also visit my website for more information on courses and other freebies I offer at: https://www.cyndibennettconsulting.com.

Photo by Mimi Thian on Unsplash