If you have Complex PTSD and are looking at the picture above with horror and anxiety, you are in the right place. Being in the type of environment shown above strikes fear in the hearts of most trauma survivors. I know I couldn’t work in that type of workspace.

The question I often get from trauma survivors is, “How can I work when I have CPTSD?” Sometimes they’d like to know if there is a job out there that won’t trigger them. These are interesting questions, so let’s dive in and see if we can find some answers.

The Challenges

Exhaustion. One of the main complaints I hear from survivors and have experienced myself is that going to work and managing your triggers/symptoms in the workplace is absolutely exhausting. Some days it’s all we can do to make it through the day.

This is especially true if we are going to trauma therapy while trying to work. Trauma therapy is exhausting in itself, and trying to combine the two is flat-out grueling. However, we are in a catch-22 situation: We are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. We need therapy to heal, but it saps the energy we need to thrive in the workplace.

And don’t you just love it when you get questions from ignorant managers or leaders asking you, “How long is this going to take?” As if you’ve just taken your car to a shop and want to know how long it will take to fix it. Seriously? I digress.

Anxiety. Trauma survivors have innumerable reasons to feel anxious. There is no way to really list them here, but I will name a few that I’ve struggled with.

One of the biggest anxieties that has plagued me in my career has been the fear of being found out. I was afraid “they” would find out that I am a trauma survivor, that I struggle emotionally every day, that I’m not qualified for my job, and so on. I didn’t want people to get to know me because I didn’t want them to find out how messed up I was.

Toxic Work Environments. While toxic work environments are no picnic for anyone, trauma survivors are more sensitive to the toxicity because it triggers them and causes them to experience emotional flashbacks of their past.

An overbearing boss can remind them of their abusive father. A perfectionistic leader can remind them of the same “not good enough” messages from their childhood.

Misalignment. What in the world do you mean by that, Cyndi? Well, here is the brutal truth in a nutshell: As trauma survivors seeking escape from our symptoms, we often run from things that trigger us or are difficult and run to things that look less destabilizing without considering our strengths and giftedness.

We attempt to work jobs that do not align with our core values because we are unaware of what they are. We may not even know our strengths and superpowers because we’ve been too busy trying to survive rather than learning how to thrive.

Triggers. I say this in most of my blog posts, but why not say it one more time for emphasis: Triggers abound in the workplace. Interestingly enough, most of those triggers are related to people, which makes sense, given that CPTSD is a relational trauma.

I believe that people are our primary triggers. People in the present remind us of people in the past who inflicted great harm on us. People create situations and scenarios that cause us to feel unsafe.

I suspect it is less about the job and more about the people. Even folks who work as technology developers creating code out of their homes can be triggered by people during daily standup meetings. Bloggers or writers who work from home can be triggered by comments or feedback they get or don’t get from their readers.

Solutions

Self-care. As much as we might long to have someone come to our rescue and take care of us, as adults, we are responsible for caring for ourselves. Most of us have to learn how to engage in self-care. When I started on this healing journey, I didn’t know I was allowed to have needs of my own and that they were allowed to be different from everyone else’s. Many of us were taught from a young age to put other people’s needs ahead of our own, and prioritizing our needs seems foreign to us.

Prioritizing our own needs might mean ensuring we get enough rest, food, health care, or even a shower. It might mean choosing not to work overtime even when the work is piling up. It might mean making sure you get out of work on time. It might mean not working through lunch. It might mean going to a therapy appointment in the middle of the workday. It might mean making sure we are getting adequate exercise and movement.

Our body will tell us what we need, but we must listen to it and act. It is not enough to purchase a gym membership and never use it. It is not to say “I’ll eat right tomorrow.” We are responsible for our self-care, and we aren’t always going to get it right, but we should prioritize it. If you don’t care for yourself, you won’t be able to maintain employment for long.

Meditation and Mindfulness. Things might be coming at us a million miles per hour, but we must be intentional about where we let our minds wander. If we are to calm the racing thoughts that continue to escalate throughout the day, we must be diligent and consistent about what we allow our minds to focus on.

It is easy to allow our minds to focus on “stinkin’ thinkin’” and go unchecked. Before we know it, our anxiety has spiraled out of control. We need to track our thoughts and ensure they align with the truth. Are you aware of the negative cognitions that play on repeat in your brain? Do you have a plan to correct or short-circuit those thoughts? It won’t happen on its own.

Boundaries. This is a hard one, and I will admit that I need a lot more work on this in my healing journey. Somehow setting boundaries seems like a foreign concept for many trauma survivors. They may not even be aware that they are allowed to set boundaries or even have boundaries, or they may not know how to set them.

Clearly identifying and articulating what is OK and not OK helps us determine how to handle potentially toxic people and work environments. People will run over us every time when we have no clearly defined boundaries. Having boundaries allows us to live within our integrity when interacting with other people.

Self-Exploration and Identity Management. This is a fun one. How many of us actually know what our strengths are or what we like and dislike from a career perspective? How many of us had a mentor, coach, or teacher that helped us figure that out? If you are like me, you never let anyone get that close to you during your formative years. You actually have to be able to trust people to let them help you…imagine that.

I spent most of my career learning about what I did not want to do before I started to be aware of what I was good at. I never believed I was really good at anything, never mind that I might have a skill or talent that others might not have. Fear of being seen kept me small for a long time.

I can remember like it was yesterday the day in therapy when I confidently told my therapist that I was “an aggregator of brilliant minds.” I remember the tilt of her head in the “that’s interesting” pose and how she asked me who told me that. At that moment, I became aware of who I was as an individual and not what someone else thought I was.

Trigger Management. I spend a lot of time talking and writing about this, but it is the main sticking point for trauma survivors. Many of us have moved from job to job to escape our triggers, and we are shocked when they continue to follow us to the next job… because it must be a conspiracy. It’s not a conspiracy. The trauma responses continue to be triggered because they live inside us. It’s like the playback feature of the jukebox of our traumatized minds. The buttons somehow get pushed, and we find ourselves emotionally dysregulated within minutes or less.

How many of us are aware of our triggers? How many of us are tracking them and the trauma responses that they cause? How many of us have a plan that consists of a healthy coping strategy we can use to neutralize the trigger? Folks, I am not that good. I still struggle with this process from time to time. I am getting much better at noticing when I’ve been triggered and how to get myself regulated again, but I am still working on trigger prevention. This is a process, and it takes more than a minute to learn and execute well.

This is why I created the trigger tracker worksheet…to help bring awareness to our triggers, emotional responses, and coping strategies, so we can better manage them. We can’t manage things we are not aware of. If you haven’t gotten your hands on this FREE tool, please click the link above and get your copy.

In Conclusion

I believe it is possible for trauma survivors to not only maintain consistent employment but to thrive in the workplace as well. No matter where we are in our healing journey, we only have to take that next right step to move forward…then the next step…and the step after that. One step at a time brings forward momentum.

Over the past couple of months, I have adopted a new mantra: “Slow progress is still.” What is the next right step for you? Do you need to step up your self-care? Do you need to establish a daily practice of mindfulness and meditation? Do you need to establish or enforce some boundaries courageously? Or maybe you need to do some self-exploration to determine your strengths. Perhaps you need to download the trigger tracker worksheet and start tracking those pesky triggers.

Remember, this is your journey, and you get to determine the next right step for you. I want to tell you some things you may never have heard before:

YOU MATTER! Your feelings MATTER! Your voice MATTERS! Your story matters! Your life MATTERS!

More than anything, I want to see you realize the dreams you’ve had for your career but can’t seem to get there on your own. (None of us can get there on our own, by the way). I am cheering for you! I believe in you! You’ve got this!!!

As always, you do not have to face this journey alone.

Contact me to schedule your free discovery call.

Get on the waiting list for the online course. You won’t want to miss it.

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Cyndi Bennett

Believer. Leader. Learner. Advocate. Writer. Speaker. Coach. Mentor. Triathlete. Encourager. Survivor.
 
Most of all, I am a fellow traveler on the rocky road called, Trauma Recovery. My mission is to minimize the effects of trauma for survivors in the workplace.