In this series, we have discussed how to make better memories to lessen the impact of those that are trauma-based and very unpleasant. The holidays are the perfect time to build new memories by beginning new traditions.

This article will focus on ways you can build a better tomorrow by using the knowledge and skills you have learned along your healing journey.

The Benefits of Making New Experiences

Allowing oneself to experience new things is vital to the healing process of overcoming complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD) or any other mental health problem. The reason this statement is true is that allowing ourselves to be open to experiencing new things is positively associated with many wonderful changes, including:

 

  • Contributing largely to our mood and well-being
  • Broadening our experiences
  • Building tolerance to uncertainty
  • Has a tremendous impact on how we live our life
  • Allows us to have a new perspective on life
  • Stimulates the mind to new thoughts and experiences
  • Improves our feeling of contentment
  • Allows us to sense a purpose for our lives

There are literally hundreds of ways benefits to making and having new experiences.

Openness to new things is associated with lots of important outcomes in one’s life, meaning that people who are naturally spontaneous and more in tune with their lives have higher levels of the above-listed outcomes. Being open to new experiences is a trait that science knows little about other than its outcomes. It is suggested, however, that openness to new experiences helps people to embrace their lives and fill them with hope and contentment.

Why Experience New Things?

Survivors of complex trauma often remain the same and dwell on old experiences. Doing so causes a great deal of pain, sorrow, and heartache. But experiencing change through new experiences helps us to grow because it challenges our boundaries, values, and awareness. Although we experience unease with change, it causes us to self-reflect and self-search.

The reasons we need to experience new things are many, but as Doctor Bessel van der Kolk recently stated (paraphrased), “we create new memories and new experiences so we can see ourselves as a different person with hope and a different future.”

Experiences through change are learning opportunities where we become enlightened and connected with who we are and where we wish to be in the future. By becoming more connected and grounded we create a better sense of ourselves that is very powerful.

Change promotes personal growth, a process of understanding yourself better and learning to push oneself to their highest level of functioning. Learning to change yourself means looking at who you are becoming and planning how to get there.

Why should you experience new things? Because without change there is no growth, and with no growth, there is no healing.

Research on Openness to New Experiences for Personal Growth

There has been research conducted to explore the connection between openness and experience. In one paper, conducted by van Allen & Zelenski in 2018, participants completed a series of tasks containing five daily logs via online. The purpose of these tasks was to engage the individual characteristics of openness to change.

One of the tasks completed in the experiment was for participants to do a series of fifteen-minute writing assignments encouraging introspection, ideas, feelings, plus a trivia question to stimulate curiosity.

The scientists reported, “A significant main effect of word count suggests that individuals who wrote more (thus did more introspection) during the daily writing tasks reported increasing higher scores in personal growth. (van Allen & Zelenski, 2018)”

To put the results better, the scientists found that the more a person does introspection during their writings the more open they were to experience personal growth.

Making better memories, by moving on into our lives using true positive reinforcements, leaving behind any shame that may bind us, will enhance personal growth.

Changing the Future Now

There is no need to wait for the chance to experience change because it will happen whether you are ready or not. Change is that one inevitability we can all count on to rock our world and, when accepted, can catapult us to a better understanding of who we are as people.

There is no better time to change the future than now. Today we have the power and the incentive to reach out to our future and grab it by the horns. While many survivors of trauma might not enjoy the thought of being in the midst of change, just reading this piece proves you are changing and ready to move ahead with your life.

Building a better future involves working on new hobbies and habits while fostering new skills. Beginning on a very personal level with dealing with the trauma you experienced, it will soon radiate out to include every aspect of your life.

Pulling It All Together

Building a better future involves experiencing changes in how we think and how we look at ourselves. At the beginning of your healing journey, the pain and sorrow may seem overwhelming and never-ending. However, if you persist in your path down the road less taken you will experience enormous personal growth.

Who knows themselves better than someone who has entered therapy and looks at themselves head-on in each session without blinders? In therapy, we learn about ourselves and become intimately aware of our flaws while at the same time acknowledging our strengths and talents.

As we face the new year, we can and must seek out new experiences and accept change so that we can not only learn more about ourselves but also make a better future for ourselves.

“The best way to predict the future is to create it.” Abraham Lincoln

“The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.” Mary Pickford

“Just because the past didn’t turn out like you wanted it to doesn’t mean your future can’t be better than you imagined.” Anonymous

References

van Allen, Z. M., & Zelenski, J. M. (2018). Testing trait-state isomorphism in a new domain: An exploratory manipulation of openness to experience. Frontiers in psychology9, 1964.

 

 

Holiday Encouragement from CPTSD Foundation

 

Could you use some extra encouragement during the holiday season? How about one email a day to help you navigate the stress of the holiday season? Sign up for FREE at https://cptsdfoundation.org/winter

 

CPTSD Foundation Awareness Wristbands

 

Official CPTSD Foundation wristbands to show the world you support awareness, research, and healing from complex trauma.

 

The official CPTSD Foundation wristbands were designed by our Executive Director, Athena Moberg, with the idea that promoting healing and awareness benefits all survivors. We hope you’ll consider purchasing one for yourself and perhaps one for a family member, friend, or other safe people who could help raise awareness for complex trauma research and healing.

 

Each purchase of $12 helps fund our scholarship program, which provides access to our programs and resources to survivors in need.

https://cptsdfoundation.org/cptsd-awareness-wristband/

 

If you’ve been wondering how our programs work, now you can try out a free sample to see if they’re right for you. We’d love to have you join us in our safe healing space.

You are always worth healing!

Weekly Creative Group

Do you like to color, paint, sew, arts & crafts? How about drawing, model building, or maybe cross stitch? Whatever creative activity you prefer, come to join us in the Weekly Creative Group. Learn more at https://cptsdfoundation.org/weeklycreativegroup

 

As always, if you or a loved one live in the despair and isolation that comes with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, please come to us for help. CPTSD Foundation offers a wide range of services, including:

 

 

All our services are reasonably priced, and some are even free. So, to gain more insight into how complex post-traumatic stress disorder is altering your life and how you can overcome it, sign-up; we will be glad to help you. If you cannot afford to pay, go to www.cptsdfoundation.org/scholarship to apply for aid. We only wish to serve you.

Building Better Memories

The Choice of Gratitude