LOVE: They Say They Love Me, But Keep Hurting Me. Can Love and Harm Coexist?
Do they love you? Do you love them? How to tell the difference between love and something else. Let’s break down why we stay when authentic love is scarce and where to start healing. What Is Love? (Baby Don’t Hurt Me) The stories that follow represent...
The Sex-Offender is Dead: The News of His Death Triggered more than Grief
How can you feel prepared for something that you’ve never experienced? Trigger Warning: This is a darker post than I normally would write, but hey, I think this will resonate for many of you. Take care of yourself as you are reading. Death is final. It happens to all...
When Negative Self-Talk Is the Only Language You Were Taught
Ask some trauma survivors to name five (5) positive things about themselves and watch what happens. The room may go quiet, they may nervously laugh, deflect, look uncomfortable, make a joke, or reach for traits that sound useful instead of personal. Reliable....
8 Things Survivors Need to Stop Apologizing For | Part 5 | Needing Reassurance (video post)
Wanting reassurance doesn’t make you needy. Sometimes it means your nervous system is still learning safety. What helps you feel emotionally safe? Click Here to watch the video (opens in a new tab) Photo Credit: Unsplash Guest Post Disclaimer: This guest...
Developmental Trauma Part 4 – Why Healing Can Feel Harder Before It Feels Better-When the Wounded Part Emerges
Review: What is Developmental Trauma? Developmental trauma is different. It is not one event. It is not even a series of events. It is the result of growing up inside danger itself—when the entire atmosphere of the home is threatening and every waking moment is...
Why Trauma Survivors Often Don’t Ask for Help Until It’s Almost Too Late
Some trauma survivors ask for help late. Very late, actually. Not when the problem first starts, or when the first warning sign shows up. Not when they are tired, scared, overloaded, sick, confused, or beginning to slip. They ask when the situation has...
The Loneliness that Wraps Around Trauma
It’s in the Silence You Hear the Loudest Things ***Trigger Warning*** This article discusses specific, explicit, aspects of a personal trauma story. Please be kind to yourself as you read. What do you carry with you every single day? Many people quietly live in the...
When You Love Someone Who Never Feels Good Enough: Understanding the Lasting Effects of Chronic Parental Criticism, Part 2
Loving an emotionally healthy partner Here is Part 1 of this series. If the adult child finds an emotionally healthy partner, they might feel uncomfortable because this person can challenge everything they learned about love. For the adult child, love was historically...