Why “Forgive and Forget” is Bad Advice for Trauma Survivors
The phrase “forgive and forget” is a common slogan and recommendation. But does it make sense for trauma survivors? While researching for my book, You Don’t Need to Forgive: Trauma Recovery on Your Own Terms, I discovered that many trauma survivors, including myself,...
When Survival Is Your Safety
Honoring the Intelligence within Your Nervous System For those who have lived through high-stress childhoods and ongoing stress, survival is not just a response—it becomes a way of being, sometimes the only way you know how to exist without even realizing you may be...
Afraid To Be With others? Afraid to be Alone? All or Nothing
Do you isolate yourself from others and feel safer alone? Or are you afraid to be alone and choose to always be with company? It is likely that these behaviors are coping strategies you’ve developed, and today, I’d like to talk about why and what to do about them now...
Grounding Techniques That Helped Me Reconnect With My Body
My Struggle with Disconnection In October 2023, I was diagnosed with severe borderline personality disorder (BPD), which can be linked to complex trauma (CPTSD). For most people, getting diagnosed with a mental health disorder can be scary. But it offered me a moment...
When the Past Cracks Open: Navigating Repressed CSA Memories in Adulthood
For most of my life, I had no reason to question my past. I had warm childhood memories, a solid understanding of who I was, and no indication that something darker lurked beneath the surface. But then, seemingly out of nowhere, my mind cracked open, and pieces of a...
The Exhaustion From Healing Is Very Real
For those of us who have begun our healing journeys, we are all too familiar with what the impact of leaving survival mode means. It signifies a shift toward healing and a more balanced and fulfilling life, enabling us to prioritize our mental well-being and work...
Communication: A Tool to Break Down Trauma Barriers
Communication: 1: A process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior. Exchange of information. 2: Information communicated, information transmitted or conveyed. A verbal or written message. Source:...
The Duality Of Rebellion: Love, Loss, And Legacy
They say addictions come in all forms. They are a way to escape from a feeling we don’t want to feel. Perhaps a dark hole of emptiness within us that we want to fill. Some time ago, the dead visited me in a dream. It was eerie and surreal. Never one to remember...