Developmental Trauma Part 4 – Why Healing Can Feel Harder Before It Feels Better-When the Wounded Part Emerges
Review: What is Developmental Trauma? Developmental trauma is different. It is not one event. It is not even a series of events. It is the result of growing up inside danger itself—when the entire atmosphere of the home is threatening and every waking moment is...
Why Trauma Survivors Often Don’t Ask for Help Until It’s Almost Too Late
Some trauma survivors ask for help late. Very late, actually. Not when the problem first starts, or when the first warning sign shows up. Not when they are tired, scared, overloaded, sick, confused, or beginning to slip. They ask when the situation has...
The Loneliness that Wraps Around Trauma
It’s in the Silence You Hear the Loudest Things ***Trigger Warning*** This article discusses specific, explicit, aspects of a personal trauma story. Please be kind to yourself as you read. What do you carry with you every single day? Many people quietly live in the...
When You Love Someone Who Never Feels Good Enough: Understanding the Lasting Effects of Chronic Parental Criticism, Part 2
Loving an emotionally healthy partner Here is Part 1 of this series. If the adult child finds an emotionally healthy partner, they might feel uncomfortable because this person can challenge everything they learned about love. For the adult child, love was historically...
When Safety Feels Like a Trap
There is a strange thing that can happen when a trauma survivor finally reaches a quieter life. They do not relax; they wait. They wait for the phone call, the slammed door, the accusation, the shift in someone’s tone, the bill they forgot, the person...
“Can’t You Take A Joke?” How Small Things Can Lead to Existential Humiliation
Have you ever found yourself suddenly humiliated, yet forced to pretend otherwise in front of people? How covert narcissists intentionally do this to their targets while appearing perfectly innocent. I’m Embarrassed That I Exist Carter’s Story Carter had been...
8 Things Survivors Need to Stop Apologizing For | Part 4 | Changing
Healing changes your tolerance, relationships, and what you’re willing to accept. Growth is not betrayal. How have you changed through healing? Photo Credit: Unsplash Guest Post Disclaimer: This guest post is for educational and informational purposes only....
Why do you lose yourself in relationships? What is codependency?
The Silence That Takes You Away From Yourself Countless African households teach their children, from a very young age, to refrain from speaking. Phrases like “Just keep quiet,” or “Don’t cause trouble” echo through our lives, passed down as wisdom from those who came...