What CPTSD Actually Feels Like for Men
There’s a weird thing that happens when you’re a male survivor of childhood abuse and you grow up. You live your life without announcing what happened to you as a kid. There’s no guidebook to follow. You just sort of wake up one day as an adult who’s technically...
I Do… A Wedding Story: How I started my wedding day alone - and gained a new family.
Say “I do…” Three little letters, two little words. It’s the simplest part of the day. But there’s nothing simple about the things that will remain unsaid. I do means I do know I could be hurt. But I’m ready to be healed with you. It means I do want to try. Even...
When the Body Keeps Score, but Blames the Mother
In the aftermath of childhood sexual abuse, a painful pattern often emerges: survivors direct blame toward nonoffending mothers. It sounds unfair because it often is. It also has a biological and developmental logic that does not care about fairness. Understanding...
Finding Freedom in My Individuality and Overcoming the Fear of Not Being Liked
I still remember the name of their exclusive club: CHABELCK. In seventh grade, the children at my middle school traded their Nintendos and Polly Pocket dolls for iPhones and Barbie dolls–in the form of minions for their social cliques. Soon after the school year...